THE LAST TORONTO QUEER SLOWDANCE: Thank you for 15 years!
With
a lending library of designated dancers for all you wallflowers, and a
dancecard-booklet to set up dances in advance (should you choose to),
Toronto Queer Slowdance has all slow songs, all night long! (Except for
the occasional intermission when we play the fastest songs we can find!)
It's high school with a happy ending. Come and experience why slow is beautiful, and why love is not ironic.
For
this event, WE ARE REQUIRING VISITORS TO WEAR MASKS when attending. Flu
is at an all time high and Covid still exists. We will have masks
available at the door for those who don't bring their own. We understand
that this policy may be controversial. We have a longer explanation at
the end of the Notes about it.
★★★
La Plaza
The Dovercourt House (Basement)
805 Dovercourt Road.
Saturday, Feb 14th, 2025
Doors open at 8:30 / Dance promptly from 9 PM – 1AM
$23 admission includes your Dancecard-booklet!
Complimentary breath mints & breath gum on-site!
19+
The Dovercourt House (Basement)
805 Dovercourt Road.
Saturday, Feb 14th, 2025
Doors open at 8:30 / Dance promptly from 9 PM – 1AM
$23 admission includes your Dancecard-booklet!
Complimentary breath mints & breath gum on-site!
19+
The entrance to La Plaza is outside and to the LEFT of the triangular staircase.
Yes, this is the building where we had the Slowdance for a decade for those who remember.
Unfortunately La Plaza is not an accessible space.
Yes, this is the building where we had the Slowdance for a decade for those who remember.
Unfortunately La Plaza is not an accessible space.
Outside,
there is a single step up to a concrete slab, then 5 steps down to a
double door. Just beyond the door is one more step down into the foyer.
★★★
Fabulous
and inspired attire, while desired, is not required. But it would be
awesome! As this event falls on VALENTINE'S DAY, perhaps wear RED.
You
do not have to be queer to attend this party, but you must have an open
mind, an open heart, and open arms. Do keep in mind that many of our
attendees fall within the LGBTTQIA+ continuum and may or may not be
interested in dancing with the "opposite" sex, so if you are stridently
straight, this may not be the most receptive community for you. That
said, we have a wide plethora of attendees, and it is impossible to know
who might show up on any given night.
We
are always looking for Designated Dancers for our evenings. If you are
outgoing, warm, and willing to undertake the joyous duty and
responsibility of inviting wallflowers out onto the dancefloor then
please contact the organizers at inconsolablecat@hotmail.com with
QUEERDD in the subject line and we will send you more information about
your role!
★★★
A NOTE ABOUT LIGHT SENSITIVITY: During the night, there will be a
mirrorball spinning in the middle of the room with a pinspot on it.
Bright lights will be reflected off of it for the duration of the event.
Additionally, our Designated Dancers wear bright LED lights on their
chests so they are easy to identify. Those sensitive to bright or
flashing lights might consider sunglasses and a hat with a brim. If you
dip in and decide it's too much, we can refund your admission.
A NOTE ABOUT THE DANCE CARDS: The dancecards are these little handmade
booklets that contain a setlist of every song that will be played that
evening. The idea is that during the course of the evening, you can
"book" certain songs with certain people, and vice versa. So when your
charming host announces a particular song, you can look on your
dancecard and see who it is you're going to dance with next. There is a
little space after every song where people can write their names. How
filled your dancecard gets depends on you, of course. Look for the
Dancecard-Signing Station located somewhere on the premises where small
pencils are available. Use of the dancecards, is, of course, optional,
and completely up to you. Proceed at your comfort level.
A NOTE ABOUT THE RULES OF ENGAGEMENT: Essentially, you have the right
to ask anyone you want to dance. But whoever it is you asked has the
right to refuse your request, and not have to give any reason why. But
wonderfully, you have this right as well. This is done because
slowdancing with someone is rather an intimate sort of enterprise, and
you should have the right to back out anytime you wish. Queer Slowdance
is about consensual respect and enjoyment.
A NOTE ABOUT THE DESIGNATED DANCERS: On any particular night there will
be a handful of our Designated Dancers available to dance with you for
the first half of the evening - so arrive early! They will be wearing
glowing lights over their hearts, and these Designated Dancers are warm,
charming, and safe people to ask to dance. Of course, the same Rules of
Engagement apply, and they, as free agents, can decide for themselves
who they want to dance with, and for how long, but in all likelihood,
they would be very open to dancing with you. Please think of them as a
warm taxi light in the middle of a blizzard.
A NOTE ABOUT OUTSIDE ALCOHOL: This event is absolutely NOT BYOB. The
venue lives off of bar sales, and Queer Slowdance exists off the
kindness of the staff at La Plaza. Additionally, outside alcohol
endangers their liquor license. So outside alcohol is strictly
prohibited! Anyone who brings in outside alcohol may be banned for life
this is that serious.
A NOTE ABOUT SCAM BOTS: Because this event page is public, the scam
bots have access to it. The week before the event, and especially the
day of, they always post a comment saying that unfortunately “something
has come up” and they cannot attend the event and that they have two
tickets for sale and that you should DM them. DO NOT DO THIS. We don't
sell tickets online. We ONLY sell them at the door in person. Don't
believe their lies.
A NOTE ABOUT COMMON SCENTS: Because at this event folks will be in very
close proximity to each other, pretty much hugging, we would like
attendees to be mindful of what they smell like. Bathing is a great
idea, but ditch the fragrances! Thank you!
A NOTE ABOUT INTERPERSONAL SAFETY: Sometimes it happens that there is
someone in the crowd who will make you feel unsafe or uncomfortable when
dancing. This does not have to be an obvious thing. It could just be a
weird feeling. You are more than within your rights to stop the dance
right there, and not have to explain. You are more than within your
rights to say to them, "Hey! Don't fucking do that!" and then discuss
your boundaries during the dance itself. We urge and encourage
discussion of boundaries. If something more serious occurs, do please
let the organizer know. The organizer is the person in the cat ears and
stunning dress at the DJ Laptop. They are both your mom & dad &
kooky aunt tonight and a safe person to come to if something happens,
and we will try to resolve it with everyone's safety in mind. The
organizer reserves the right to ask anyone to leave for any reason which
they do not have to divulge to anyone.
A LONGER NOTE ABOUT THE MASKING POLICY: We get a lot of emails. I don't
always reply to everyone, but I read everything. When there is no
masking, it's asserted that the event is being discriminatory towards
the immunocompromised, and that queer folks are overrepresented in that
category. When the event mandates masks, it's asserted that the event is
discriminating against those who have mental health challenges, because
SSRIs make body temperature regulation difficult, and masks make it
impossible, and that queers are overrepresented among those who take
anti-depressants.Both these assertions, I think, are legitimate. But they're also asking for mutually exclusive conditions. And honestly, the stress of trying to accomodate everyone is giving me an ulcer. Here's the thing: I'm not a doctor or scientist. I started putting on quirky events as a fun thing to do, and because I felt there was a need for them. In this circumstance, I realize that whatever policy we adopt, people are going to be disappointed and upset. So I did the only fair thing I could think of: Go back and forth from Maskless to Masked, event to event. This final event falls on a MASKED turn.
A NOTE ABOUT THIS BEING THE LAST ONE: If you've read this far, then
perhaps you'll read a little further. Hi! I'm the organizer and host,
Joe Catman, AKA Sherwin Sullivan Tjia. I started doing this event in
2010 out of a love for slowdancing, and it seemed to fill a need our
community didn't know it needed. Most events cater themselves to
extroverts, but this one was for those a little more introverted. Or
rather, it was a way to be extroverted and introverted at the same time,
with music at a volume where you could actually have a conversation.For a decade I did it almost monthly on the main floor of the Dovercourt House. It was great! Not every time, but most of the time. I made a lot of new friends, and all of you did too. Over the years I've had people come to me and relate stories about how they found new friends or partners at the event. I even have a list of 11 couples who eventually got married as a result of the event. I remember palpably one night, near the end, where someone got down on a knee and proposed. One couple actually rented the room ABOVE the slowdance so they could get married and then come downstairs to have their first dance as newlyweds. I've been incredibly honored and humbled by all these accounts, and I thank you all for telling me about them over the years.
I had intended to retire in December of 2020. I was a little burnt out. I had actually set up a year of Slowdances leading up to the date. And then, funnily enough, the Coronavirus decided to grant me early retirement. Everything stopped. And then a couple years of fear began.
As we slowly emerged from lockdowns, and vaccines became available, I started doing the Queer Slowdance again. Not monthly, but occasionally. I missed people. I missed you all. I missed the warmth of a roomful of people all embracing and swaying.
I came back out to do them largely as a result of outreach from folks
at the Tranzac, who lured us out of hiding, and to which we're forever
grateful. Then we came home to the Dovercourt House, and into the
basement venue, La Plaza. Energy-wise, I could only manage to do it
twice a year at that point. I live in Montreal, and I actually travel to
Toronto to do the slowdance. But unfortunately over the past year I
have had some health issues that is making travel increasingly
difficult.
THANK YOU ALL for 15 fabulous years of this event. You kept it going.
You brought the love and the warmth. You showed everyone that
slowdancing could work outside of junior high and weddings. And you
healed my heart every time this world broke it over the last 15 years. I
will love you all forever.
★★★
"Relive the prom without the angst." - the Canadian Press
"In
an age where physical contact is a scarce commodity, an event that
brings strangers safely together is long overdue." - The Montreal
Gazette
"I really like hugging people, and this is like, a five-minute hug." - Telyn Kusalik, one of our guests
★★★
Copyright 2026 Joe Catman AKA Sherwin Sullivan Tjia. Written By a Real Human Being! Not freaking AI!
